Up and writing.

Here I am. 1 am.

I don't sleep well anymore. It just doesn't seem to want to work.

It is not that my life is falling apart. Rather, I view it as falling into place. It's a tough view to have.

My vertigo is getting worse and worse now. As soon as darkness happens the spinning starts. I think it's the asthma, but my inhaler will just keep me up all night with the shakes.

That's ok though, right? I have my paradise by my computer light. My 19" LCD screen gives me a window to the world. My Ubuntu 9.04 frees me from the grip of corporatocracy.

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It's a sad world for someone who doesn't fit into the categories. Since finishing the paper all I can think about is my postgenderist ligature.

You probably don't get it. If you do, I'll hug you. Until then, ask me. It's been my obsession since I was 4 years old, dejected from the realm the binary left behind. Like paradise lost, chasing a dream of perfection that climaxed before I was in elementary school.

I'm writing songs for all of you again. Two songs are already finished. One I wrote when I was 15 and the other I wrote 3 years ago.

I'll free myself by freeing you, thank you very much. The greatest reward is the smile on your face when you see light on the cave wall for the first time.

Tomorrow, I'll change a life. My hope is that it is yours. You are in my thoughts, and believe me: I'll be here to save you.